Although this happened more than three weeks ago, lazy me is posting this now. So yes I have finally done it and the photograph on the left is proof of that(incase you chaps and skeptical women had an iota of doubt). Ofcourse it could also be mistaken for a fancy dress competition but I was not in the mood to wear a black gown on a hot sultry day in the middle of Newark.

Although I had graduated in December itself, the college conducts its convocation just once a year so there we were, lined up to collect our degrees or fake ones (we had received the original ones in the mail about two months earlier). The event took place in the Prudential Center and it was good to see the happy faces of all students and parents. I remember, I last attended a graduation ceremony in high school. At that time we euphorically sang our school song while we held candles in our hand that fiercely burned as signs of our innermost desires, dreams and bright future ahead.

Nine years later, the candle continued to shine while certain other thoughts crossed many young minds. Was all this good riddance from all those long sleepless nights, that last minute rush to complete assignments, cursing the internet network when assignments had to be uploaded, the not so subtle requests to friends to do a part or major portion of the projects, smoking, drinking on the patio, having those futile discussions on arbitrary topics?.... Atleast for most of us all the aforementioned things had come to fruition. Suddenly it had dawned on me that I was never going to go back to college again not that I would go back to school if given a choice

So what now? Suddenly the wheels have stopped turning, the signal has turned red and the car of life slowly waits to join the rest of the highway traffic moving along in the monotonous patterns that the world and society has blueprinted for us. All the while that we were in college, we complained, whined and expressed discontent at every point about the screwed up educational system and how it would be better that all these boring academics came to an end and we got down to what was essentially important - earning money. But now that I find myself at the end of that academic road and grinding myself into that tedious cycle of job, eat, sleep, job, I feel those days in college weren't that bad as I had made out to be.

I find myself unable to bring or create the heady atmosphere again partly due to the fact that all my old friends have left(especially the two in the picture with whom I have spent the last three years) and/or are spread out to different parts of the country and world and partly due to the fact that it is always easier to swim with the tide than against it. Why bother when one thing is proven to work this way, why to put a spanner in the works? I don't know whether I ever will try to swim against the tide and risk drowning but what I yearn to do is to swim in style once again. Take pleasure in the smallest walks of life, get in touch with myself , get in touch with the God inside us. Because the pressures of life have made it difficult to escape. Negative thoughts have seamlessly found their way into my breath which like carbondioxide threaten to extinguish the candle which I tried so dearly to keep glowing.

I want to and I wish and I will keep the spark alive that defined our college life, the best days that have gone by, with not so much as the same immature, bordering on the childish behavior but by exploring some new avenues in friendships, relationships and misclleaneous pastimes. Let the candle continue to burn....

As if falling and graying hair weren’t clues enough, I get up today morning with a back and neck ache. Ouch ! it was painful and is still hurting as I write this entry. Ofcourse, there is no recession to blame for this but only my own stupid bed and perhaps China…..How? Just read on….

I have two beds at my place. One is a double bed kept specially for those eternally optimistic beliefs about meeting someone at the club or pub and one thing leads to another kind of fairy tales ;). Ok alright I am kidding. The truth of the matter is that two months ago I was living with two roomies who had to leave suddenly leaving this rotten piece of equipment behind. So when I moved I decided to bring this along. I also have my own bed but that is currently being used by my maata-shri. So now I sleep on this piece of junk whose springs have disintegrated like some trashy “Made in China” toy. Hey wait a minute , isn’t this bed made in China? Or for that matter everything from that battery in your mobile phone to the 50 inch of complex electronics hanging on your wall

China, a country that claims and is claimed by many to be the next super power by everyone and anyone who possesses a knowledge of current affairs even though those so called expert people might now even know their own neighbours. Just to give you a simple example….we bought a set of knives from Target stores obviously made with the Sino prowess. Unsurprisingly they were not too expensive but when it came to using them, they were so pathetic I might well have used my car keys to cut something. I doubt if they are even good enough to make an incision on my finger which ofcourse I didn’t try otherwise my mom would have woken up the neighborhood which incidentally does include a Chinese. Wonder if he would have proved his point then. And this is the case with most of the things they make, I guess durable and reliable does not feature in their manufacturing dictionary. Even the great democracy of India awoke to this bullshit and ousted the CPI.